Monthly Archives: March 2013

Easter Sunday, Melted Eggs!

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So, today is Easter Sunday. The one-day of the year we all have an excuse to stuff ourselves silly with chocolate. I even had two eggs this year, obviously I had mine melted down because I can’t swallow some solid foods. Anyway, once the eggs were melted down, I grabbed a spoon and started eating like a yogurt, it was very sweet, it was like I swallowed whole bag of sugar! The sweetness of the chocolate was certainly strong, but it didn’t bother me because I have a sweet tooth. I only regretted it afterwards because it made me feel very sick, I don’t know if it was the amount of sugar or the rich texture, but either way I was laid up in bed listening to my stomach make weird noises.

Melted Easter eggs 31 March 2013

Melted Easter Eggs

As I mentioned before, my day has been spent nursing this sickness. I haven’t done much else, well unless you count sleeping as an activity.
Even though I am feeling terrible, I haven’t forgotten to drink plenty of fluids because I would feel worse if I got dehydrated, I have been like that before and it certainly makes you feel incredibly worse.

I think today has been another lazy day for me, nothing else has happened, well apart from watching the Oxford and Cambridge boat race earlier, unfortunately Oxford won, sorry if that upsets any readers, but I support my hometown of Cambridge no matter what happens.

Anyhow, on to the evening. The sickness was still plaguing me, and with every step I took, the feeling of sickness and fatigue were taking it’s toll on my body. I had some luck mind, when I woke up I found that mother left me some Chili con carne on the stove. I had this with some noodles, it was very tasty. When I sat down and ate the meal mum said you better be careful, it has a kick to it. I think her taste buds are dying because that had no kick at all, I have had bigger kicks up my own backside then that. I don’t think mother put any spices in it because I tasted no spices, it was like eating a Chili stew. Anyway, but needless to say it was tasty, and for a change it didn’t give me stomach ache.

So, after today’s sickness, I think it is time for me to have an early night, which probably won’t happen because I always have restless nights. Signing off now, may you all be well and I hope you didn’t eat too many eggs.

Until tomorrow,


Crazy Weather Moments!

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The weather has been crazy today, one minute it is snowing and then the next minute the suns shining. When I woke up this morning, I discovered that I was suffering from sinus problems, it made me feel very stuffed up in my face, and the headache I had was terrible!

After I woke up and had breakfast, I received a call from the mobile company again, it was the manager I spoke with on Monday, he was calling me back because the problem was ongoing and he also apologized for not ringing me back on Wednesday. During the call we went over more technical steps to try to resolve the issue, but in the end that didn’t work. The manager was confused because the SIM card was refusing to talk to the network, they tried everything to get this to work, but with every attempt they made it just failed. Anyhow, to be brief, the manager has to escalate this further because they believe the issue cannot be resolved and they need to know what has to be done now, e.g. Compensation and termination. This whole situation is starting to annoy me because it should be working, even the manager confirmed that this shouldn’t be going on this long, and they also confirmed that there were no activation issues in the last two weeks, which means someone in the technical team have been telling lies again! I have to wait for the manager to callback in the next couple of days, to see what the next stage is, I have made it clear to the manager about my intentions of not paying if it goes over a month, so let’s hope they get this resolved quickly.

As the afternoon came along, myself and Laura (sister) had to get some shopping from Tesco. When we got closer to the shop, I noticed the town seemed unusually busy today, it was like everyone decided to jump in their cars at the same time, there was traffic backed up for half a mile. I don’t see why people are rushing about, the shops are only closed for one day, it isn’t like we are running out of food, people have gone crazy! Anyhow, we were lucky because we were walking, which was better than waiting around in a long queue. So, after a short walk around Tesco, we got all our shopping and headed back home in the snow.

When we got home, I needed to have something to eat because I was starving. I have been very hungry lately, it is like I want to eat constantly! I guess it won’t cause me any harm to eat more, I need to put on more weight anyway. After I had something to eat, we decided to go over to the park again to take some more pictures. To be brief, the walk around the park went fine, well until the weather decided to change! The snow came out of nowhere, it hit us from every direction. I had to rush to put my camera away, the last thing I wanted was the weather to kill my brand new camera.

Skipping ahead to the evening. I have spent most of the time chatting with K and feeling rubbish. This lack of energy has come out of nowhere, I guess I will have an early night. So, on that note, it’s time for me to sign off.

Until tomorrow,


Good Friday, and Camera Test

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So, today is good Friday, which means everyone has a four-day weekend to look forward to. My day started out with a visit from Hannah & Amber (nieces), they were spending the day with us because Cassie (sister) was doing something to her bathroom (I think). Hannah will be staying over tonight, which is good because she can have fun with Laura (sister) on the Playstation.

Anyhow, after a few hours went by, we all headed over to our local McDonalds to have lunch. While we were in the area, I needed to grab some shopping because I ran out of yogurts (I really need to find a cheaper alternatives!)

Skipping ahead an hour. We were finally home and I could finally have something to eat, I was starving, it was my own fault because I only had a small breakfast. I wanted to have something big, but I really couldn’t be bothered, so I decided to have yogurts instead, and yes, I know I am lazy! Anyway, after I had something to eat, I spent the afternoon resting on the sofa. I was awake until 3am last night and I think the lack of sleep caught up with me because I felt completely drained.

So, the evening was nearly here and I was looking forward to resting on the sofa, but before I could do this, I needed to go out and test my new camera at the local park. Anyhow, to be brief, I got a few pictures of the park and I have put them below this paragraph. I didn’t take as many as I would have liked, but it was cold and I didn’t want to freeze my fingers off.

Baby Amber Smiles 23 March 2013

Baby Amber Smiles

Laura and Hannah 29 March 2013

Laura and Hannah Hugs

Park 23 March 2013

Park Overview


Duck Through The Trees


Squirrel Face on

When I got back from the park I discovered that I had been stung on my hand. I don’t know how this happened because I didn’t feel anything sting me while I was out. The only time I noticed the sting was when I started to make a cup of tea, it was stinging a lot. I had to squeeze all the venom out of it and I also needed to get the stinger out. The stinger and venom came out perfectly, which was good because I was worried that I was going to have an allergic reaction.

So, with that said, I think it is time to sign off. I am going to have an early night because I am feeling very exhausted, I guess the late night has caught up with me. I hope you all enjoyed the pictures.

Until tomorrow,


Saga, Confusion, and Camera!

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Well, today has certainly been stressful. I have been on the phone to the mobile company again because my service hasn’t been restored. I spent a good two hours going through diagnostics with five individuals, and after no success, they were left confused because the SIM card was refusing to talk to the network. After all the confusion, they finally had the problem escalated to the first line technical team, which means it is above the normal technical team, and I had a strike of luck because the complaint I made has been passed onto the higher management team because this problem should have been fixed already without all the feeble excuses. Anyhow, with that said, according to the first line technical team, the problem has been caused by a system activation error and it will take forty-eight hours to restore my phone service. I don’t know about you, but I don’t believe this will work because they have admitted my account has been fully messed up by one of their technical team, I think they’re trying to hang it out to see if it sorts itself out. I have warned the company in question about pending legal action if my service isn’t restored, in all fairness, I have the right to do this because the problem is with them and not me. I can only hope that my service will restore itself soon, but in all honesty, I won’t be holding my breath, they have said all this before.

So, after all the confusion and stress, it was time to sit down and have a drink. I didn’t have one all morning because of all the stress. While I was having a hot chocolate, a package arrived for me, it was the rechargeable kit for my iPhone and iPad. This rechargeable kit is able to charge both devices fully and it will have enough battery power to charge them again. When I was testing the rechargeable kit, it seemed to work flawlessly, it charged my iPhone5 very quickly and it kept the device charged all day. This rechargeable kit will come in handy next week when we are away in Yorkshire.

Skipping ahead to the afternoon. I spent most of the time in bed feeling rubbish, I felt very tired, and the weather didn’t help matters because it was freezing! As I laid there in my bed, I sat watching a film on Netflix, which didn’t last long because I fell asleep after ten minutes.
When I woke, I was greeted by mother’s voice calling me for dinner. She made a beautiful Korma curry, it hit the spot nicely, even after I finished my helping I was craving more! I was in luck this time because mum didn’t want the rest of hers, so I thought why not nosh hers down too, it will only go to the waste bin if I didn’t eat it. Anyhow, after I ate all that, I was truly stuffed! I couldn’t eat another thing, even thinking about food makes me feel sick at the moment because I am beyond stuffed.

So, on to the evening. I have a funny story to share. I have been waiting all day for my new Canon 1100D camera to arrive and for some reason I started to panic because I thought it wasn’t going to turn up, so from there my stomach went mad and I had to run to the toilet. Well, to be brief, as I opened the toilet door, there was a knock at the front door, it was the delivery man delivering my camera. I couldn’t believe I had a small panic because of that, it wasn’t even worth getting stressed over, but it doesn’t matter now because it has been delivered now.
Anyhow, I won’t give many details away, but this camera will go a long way to help towards future projects.

The rest of my evening was spent writing out today’s blog and nursing a stomach ache. I will have to ride the pain out and take it easy, and yes K you were right, it is my fault, but I promise I won’t have anymore spicy food, well I will try the best I can (smiley face).

So, with that said, it is time to sign off. Today has certainly been stressful and lucky, let’s hope things start looking up with the mobile saga.

Until tomorrow,


Another day, and no service!

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Today has been surprising. The SIM card has finally arrived, third time lucky as they say, well it hasn’t been that lucky because it still hasn’t worked. When I spoke to the mobile provider, they told me that the account has been messed up by a member of staff knocking my number off the network, which means it will be very hard to fix, the person I spoke with said the chances are of it fixing are very low, and if it doesn’t fix they will have to cancel my contract because it is their fault and not mine. I will have to wait and see what they say because I am happy to work with them, but what I won’t be happy about is paying them money for a service that I can’t even use, which in fairness they have said the same.

After I got off the phone to my network provider, I needed to get ready to go into town because I was going with Laura’s partner David to look for a new camera that he wanted.

Oh before I forget to mention, I ordered myself a brand new camera today, it was a tad bit expensive, but I am hoping it will pay for itself over time because I have a few plans up my sleeve. Anyhow, I will discuss that tomorrow once it has been delivered, back to what I was talking about.

So, with that said, we started heading towards the bus stop. I was hoping that we didn’t have to wait long for the bus, but it didn’t turn out like that. We stood at the bus stop for thirty minutes before a bus arrived, I am guessing that bus every ten minutes stuff has gone out of the window, sounds about right for our local council. Anyhow, after our long wait, the bus finally arrived! I was glad it arrived because I think body parts were going to fall off if we stood there much longer.

After a short journey, we were finally in town, which also meant we had to walk in the freezing cold weather, yea thanks a lot British weather, you could change occasionally you know, stop playing the same old tune of cold and wet weather! Picture how cold I was, I only had a thin shirt on underneath my coat and the cold was going up my back, it felt like someone stuffed ice cubes down my shirt … Okay I will stop complaining. Anyway, after going around a few shops, we decided to stop off at Costa Coffee, hint, hint, sponsor maybe? I only had my normal order, hot chocolate and Tea. As I drank my drink, I remembered I needed to take my pills, I forgot to take them this morning, yes I know, naughty Marc, but don’t worry it’s okay, I won’t do it again!

Skipping ahead. After an unsuccessful camera search, it was time to head home, but before we did, I stopped off at one shop to pick up a new memory card. The memory card was 32GB in size and it only cost me £15, and yes Steve I know I could have brought a class 10 for £5 more, but I forgot, you know what I am like, I will remember next time, how many times have I said that? I am resisting the urge to laugh because I say that every time and I always forget, but the good thing is Steve doesn’t mind, he always understands that I forget, he is like a brother to me because he always looks out for me and tries to give me the best deals.

So, I got the memory card, and we were waiting to get a bus home. While we were waiting for a bus, we heard a noise, it sounded like someone was acting like a car engine, you wouldn’t believe this, but it was three kids riding their bikes through the bus station acting like a car! I could help myself from laughing at their stupidity, they must have upgraded their bike engines. As they went past, the bus conductor laughed and said f***ing idiots, to be honest it was humorous, but who hasn’t been guilty of being stupid occasionally? Anyhow, after a ten minutes went by, we were nearly at our bus stop, all we needed to do was to get up and wait for the bus to stop, this didn’t go to plan! I started to get up, and from out of know where the bus decides to turn sharply around a corner, well from there I ended up on my backside nearly knocking a poor woman over.

I am going to skip ahead to the evening because nothing else major happened, after all I have rambled on enough already. The evening was the same old really, which was good because I wasn’t up for doing anything special.

So, with that said, it is time for me to sign off, but before I do, here is something that all men should remember, a man is only as good as the woman who leads him.

Until tomorrow,


Relaxed, and Bad Tooth!

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I can’t believe how relaxed today has been. I got up and done the same old breakfast routine, watched TV and had something to eat, you know the same old daily rubbish.

Most of my day has been focused on writing my eating disorder story, from the morning until late in the afternoon I was sat at the dinning room table with a pen and paper writing down several parts I could use for my story. I don’t know what was wrong with me today, I couldn’t get my words in order today, it was like somebody was in my head moving everything around, think of it like a spring clean, but done in reverse, while I was trying to clean it out, they were trying to mess it up!

This writing lark becomes hard at times, sometimes you have  ideas in your head and then other times you don’t, it is selective at times. As I have said before, I can sit for hours writing a story, but the chances are it won’t make sense to anyone because I know that I talk rubbish at times, you all know what I mean by this! Anyhow, I tend to get through this writing problem easily, I just start writing about something different for ten minutes and then it all comes flooding back to me.

So, other than that, I haven’t done much else all day. I did go to Tesco though, a day wouldn’t be complete without stopping off there. This time I needed to go there because I have a stained tooth, it has been like it for a while and I need it sorting, to be honest it makes me feel embarrassed because it looks like I don’t look after my teeth. I wouldn’t mind, but I don’t drink or smoke, so I don’t know why it has gone that way. I would understand if it was smoking or drink, but for someone who doesn’t even touch the stuff, it is a complete mystery!

Anyway, while I was at Tesco, I picked up some special toothpaste called “Pearl Drops,” according to the box, it is meant to restore the whiteness in your teeth. Knowing my luck it won’t work, but I have some hope because the tooth isn’t dead yet, so I might have saved it. I hope it doesn’t fall out, if it does it will mean I have to see the dentist to have a false one fitted, which isn’t cheap might I add! When it comes to replacing any of my teeth, I want them replaced with gold teeth, rather than anything less because they will last long, and they will look really lush. Could you imagine that? A whole mouth filled with gold teeth! Oh, when can I get this done?

Skipping ahead to the evening. I totally forgot to write the blog for today, I only realized at 7pm when Laura said to me have you written today’s blog? I replied oh no! I forgot! I quickly jumped out of my seat and turned the laptop on, I was like a bluebottle, rushing around everywhere just to get this done. I was going that quick that anyone would have thought I was on crack! What also surprised me, was how quick I could write five hundred words, it is amazing what you can do in a rush!

So, anyway, I think it is time to sign off, but before I do, I wanted to update you with the mobile phone saga. The SIM card still hasn’t arrived, but knowing them it won’t arrive, then they will end up making up more excuses. Anyhow, the complaints manager will be ringing me tomorrow, so I hope he has good news about a compensation package because I won’t be putting up with this again!

So, let’s hope it’s all good news tomorrow!

Until tomorrow,


Some Progress, Sim Saga

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Well, after a long night of terrible sleep, the day was finally here. I had a very bad dream last night, it was one of those dreams that made no sense, to be honest I think it was caused by the cold weather. This assumption is based on previous events of a similar nature, in all honesty this problem is easy to solve, I just grabbed my second duvet and wrapped myself up in a ball. After ten minutes went by, I could feel my body warming up, and from there I just fell asleep until 9am.

The morning was bitterly cold, I ended up with my duvet wrapped around most of the morning. I hate this kind of weather, it gets into my muscles and causes me loads of pains. I am glad it isn’t snowing today, let’s hope the snow goes away very soon because we need some warmer weather.

Anyhow, I have some news on the mobile saga. I had a call from the complaint’s department today, they were deeply saddened to learn their staff had treated me badly. The person I spoke with explained that I couldn’t use the SIM card I had because it was assigned to a number on Pay as you go, which meant it couldn’t port my number over. This means the last week of trouble has been a big waste of time for both parties involved, when he told me this, I was very annoyed because their staff should know the differences between SIM cards and what they do, but anyway, it looks like there will be some light at the end of the tunnel because they’re sending me the right SIM card and they will be ringing me Wednesday To talk about a compensation package. So, let’s hope there is light at the end of the tunnel.

I forgot to mention that mum’s parcel is coming today. I bought her the Osmonds up close and personal box set collection for her birthday, well and partly for mothers day. I let her have it early because she would only moan at me, and I couldn’t be mean to her after all. Overall she is very pleased with the box set, she was watching it all afternoon, and she even cried when they sang some of the songs. She was on tender hocks all morning, every ten minutes she was looking for the delivery man, god help him when he turned up, she probably ripped it out of his hands. I wouldn’t know what happened because myself and Laura needed to get some shopping.

So, on to shopping. As we walked to the shop we were battered by the bitter wind, it hit our faces like little ice daggers. Anyhow, after a short walk, we were at the shop. I only needed to get some more yogurts, it seems like I go through yogurts like mad lately, I guess I am getting very hungry these days. Anyway, after a quick rush around the shop, it was time to brace the bitterly cold weather again. While I was walking home I got a call from Steve, we just had a general chat about stuff, you know as good friends do, it certainly took my mind off the bitter wind that was smacking me in the face.

Well, after all that we were back home. I was glad to be in the warm again. I had to leave my coat on for thirty minutes to warm up because my whole body was stone cold. After I warmed up, I made myself some plain noodles so I could try some new chili & garlic sauce I bought. I think I tried the sauce years ago on a kebab, my memory isn’t what it used to be, so I can’t remember when. So, with my lunch made, it was time to taste The Almighty sauce. As I put the noodles in my mouth it didn’t seem so bad, but wasn’t I wrong! The sauce got hotter as I shoveled more noodles in my mouth, in the end I couldn’t take anymore so I stopped eating them and got some yogurts to eat so it could neutralize the spice.

Skipping ahead to the evening. Today has been one those days that make you realize that things can get sorted in the end. I also want to say, I am very thankful for my close friends, you know who you are, through the good and the bad times, we will be there for each other no matter what happens.
So, on that delightful note, time for me to go and turn this laptop off. I am exhausted and after last nights lack of sleep, I think I need to do some catching up.

Until tomorrow,


Birth Negligence, and Notes

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Today started out with pains in my hip, it felt very stiff, and before you all start thinking dirty, no I didn’t mean the obvious crude stiffness, so get your mind out the gutter.

Anyhow, I haven’t done much today. I have spent most of the day looking through sixteen years worth of medical documents. I am doing this because I want to finally get proper answers surrounding my birth. During my investigation, I noticed that several doctors have all agreed that I had a brain injury which was caused at birth, this wasn’t just one doctor, it was four doctors over the space of sixteen years. I am going to carry on fighting because it is my right to know the truth, and if that means it takes me years to do then that is what I am going to do.

I have been writing notes all afternoon, I can’t believe the case was chucked out at the time because even an outside doctor to the case agreed that I was over-ventilated, so if that isn’t birth negligence, then I don’t know what is.

Anyway, apart from this, I have been trying to sort out the mobile saga (yet again). This time round, I got through to someone very helpful, they ran more tests on my account and found that there was an error on their system (like I told them before), even though the problem was still not sorted, they still tried their hardest to help. They of course had to credit my account again because it is their problem. I have to wait for another SIM card to arrive to try to get the problem sorted, but even with that said, they warned me that it might not fix the problem, which means that would need to credit my account every day for loss of service until the problem is sorted, so expect this to carry on because they have told me this before and nothing changed.

Expanding on this issue further. I mentioned yesterday that I was advised to put in a complaint because I was treated very badly, so, with that said, I spent an hour constructing a complaint and I hope they get back to me because it would be an hour wasted, and it will also mean they don’t really care.

So, anyway, away from these issues, it has been snowing all day again. I wish it would stop, it is spring for goodness sake! Apart from this, I haven’t done anything else today, it is Sunday after all, so you wouldn’t expect much to happen.

Anyway, on that note, it is time to sign off. Let’s hope tomorrow will look brighter, and hopefully it won’t snow all day again!

Until tomorrow,


Snow, and Rude People!

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Well, this evening has been enjoyable. I ended up in a long chat with Steve & Carl, it lasted until 2am, I don’t know how I stayed up so late.

The conversation was mostly spent talking about ghosts and the upcoming meet up in York that we are having. When we were talking about ghosts, it started to make me feel a bit on edge, my mind went into overdrive and I kept on looking around the room to make sure nothing was going to creep up on me. Don’t get me wrong, the thought of ghosts do scare me, but it also excites me because you don’t know if you will come across one. I am a firm believer that ghosts do exist in some form, but they’re not as bad as people make them out to be. I have previously spoken about one experience of ghosts when I was younger, it certainly scared me, between you and me, it made cry. I was only eight years old at the time, so I didn’t really understand, and I always thought ghosts were going to cause me harm. As I have grown up, the thought of ghosts hasn’t plagued me, the only time it does is when I let my mind go haywire. I think this fear of ghosts is natural, we all have fears, it doesn’t matter what it is, we all have them.

After a couple of hours went by, Carl needed to go to bed because he was tired from his long day at work.
When Carl left, myself and Steve started talking about many random topics. We ended up getting on to the topic of my birth and how it has affected since I had my case dismissed for medical negligence. I have felt very broken up ever since this happened, it isn’t easy to accept, how can I feel okay with something, when I don’t know the truth surrounding my birth? I have to go through life not knowing what happened, it couldn’t be one of these events that just happen. I have been through my medical records and it clearly states that I was starved of oxygen, then after that, I was given too much oxygen, which means it caused my brain injury. I have had this looked at by several doctors and they have all said that it contributed to my brain bleed & tumor. I know I shouldn’t dwell on this, but I have the right to the truth, and no matter how many times I ask the hospital, they end up ignoring the question and chat on about something I didn’t ask them about.

Anyhow, I don’t want to ramble on about that, you will find out more when I publish a book about it, plus it is 3:30am and I am getting extremely tired. As I say it is late, so I am going to rest my head for a few hours. I have got a long day tomorrow because I want to write notes about my medical records, this will allow me to start making sense of this whole situation.

The morning started out with a light dusting of snow, yes we have snow again, it is meant to be spring and we are sat in the middle of bleeding snowstorm. What has the world coming to?
Anyhow, enough of the weather discussion, it is such a boring subject anyway, but if you haven’t seen snow before then here is a picture.

Light Dusting of Snow

Light Dusting of Snow

So, it was coming up to 12pm and I needed to go out with Laura to get some shopping because I was running out of food.
While we were walking to the shop, the snow was battering us from every direction, it kept on going into my eyes which annoyed me, but I had to put up with it because you can’t walk along with your eyes shut, or else you will walk into everything.
After a short walk, we were finally at Tesco. I was glad to be in the warm, it was freezing outside and it felt like my fingers were going to drop off. As we were walking around the shop, I noticed something weird, it was a jar of bacon jam, what a weird combination of flavors, each for their own I guess. I will leave a picture below of the bacon jam, then every bacon lover can spread this on their toast.


Bacon Jam

When the mid afternoon came, I needed to ring the mobile phone company yet again. This was meant to be an open and shut case, but wasn’t I wrong! They refused to help, and passed the blame by passing me from one person to the next. I haven’t known a company like it, even when I spoke to managers, they refused to help and decided to try to talk over me, instead of hearing what I had to say. After being passed around to eight advisers and two manager call backs, I got passed to a nice lady from the retention’s team, she listened to everything I had to say, and she also understood how badly I have been treated. I couldn’t believe that I found someone who understood my point, and the best thing was that she explained things in simple terms for me, which was a big help because I suffer from learning difficulties.

So, with that said, I need to fill out a complaint form and request a callback from someone who will look over the situation correctly. I hope this problem gets sorted soon because my patience is starting to run very thin, it isn’t fair that they have treated me like this, after all I pay my bill, and in all honesty I don’t take kindly to someone talking to me like dirt.

Anyhow, the evening is now here and I am completely exhausted. I have never known a situation to drain me like this before, my shoulder and neck are aching like anything, it feels like someone is stabbing me in the neck with a rusty knife.

Anyway, I think it is time to sign off, I have had enough for today. I hope everyone stays well and I hope your dreams are filled with warming love.

Until tomorrow,


Escaping Reality Rambling

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Today started out with a lovely lie in, I couldn’t believe the time, it was 9:30am and I couldn’t be bothered to move out of my warm bed. I don’t know why I felt so tired, I slept all night, I didn’t even wake up. I must have had a nightmare or a restless night, either way I felt rough.
When I finally had the energy to move, I got up and headed towards the kitchen to make a cup of tea. I was still half asleep while I was making my drink, I rubbed my eyes several times before the blur disappeared from my eyes.

Anyhow, after a drank my drink, I laid down on the sofa again because my energy and pain were causing me to feel very low.
I had another pain in my gallbladder again, it started last night after dinner, I thought it was going to pass, after all I have had this before. I always hate having these problems because it gives me flu symptoms, to be honest I never know if I have a cold or a gallbladder issue. Anyway, nothing I can do really, apart from drinking loads of liquids and regulate my fat intake.

Skipping ahead to something that is on my mind. I have been feeling somewhat lonely lately, don’t get me wrong I have some fantastic friends, but most of them live in other parts of the country, which makes it harder because you would love to see them everyday. I am lucky in a way because I communicate with close friends every day over Skype, text messages or email.
The problem I have is that, I am always stuck in this house, the only time I venture out the house is when I need to get food shopping. I know it may seem sad, but I have had life like this for years now, even when I was at school, I was never the popular student, the only time I was popular, was when other students wanted to bully me for their own amusement.
I guess this explains why I ended up overweight when I was younger, I ate because it took away the pain of the hurt I felt. I used to go home and lock myself away in my room, and then I would eat loads of food. The bullying got worse, and in all fairness no one gave a toss about what was going on, you would think a school would help, but that isn’t the case, all they care about is sweeping it under the carpet.
This isn’t some guilt trip, this is real life, I have been through so much, and in all honesty my life has never changed. I have always been alone, and no matter what I do, there is always someone causing me trouble, if you are close friend to me then you will know what I have been through.

So, getting to the point. I think this is why I write a lot because I am able to write scenarios that would only appear in fairy tales. I guess this is one of those moments when you think, well is this all I have? I have fantastic friends and family, but the life I yearn for is only found in fairy tales and it isn’t reality, or is it? I have always questioned many aspects of life, it always seems like everything is uncertain and nothing works out for those who are always trying to have a better life. The old saying goes, those who cheat, will always win, they will get everything handed to them on a plate. Whereas the people who struggle get nothing, and they end up struggling, no wonder depression has increased over the years.
I know one thing, the life I have at the moment will not change, unless fairy tales come true, then nothing will ever change for me.
I always hope that life will change, no world hunger, no war, no hatred, and most of all a life where people are treated as equal, maybe this will happen when hell freezes over, who knows really, this world is a mixed bag of tricks, nothing ever works out and there is always something that gets in the way to make the world even colder.

Take what you like from these rambling words, maybe I am wrong, or maybe I am right, who knows? I just wish mine would have a change of luck, I guess that’s what everyone is wishing, but sometimes it doesn’t happen.

So, it is coming up to the evening, and I am feeling many pains going through my gallbladder. I will have to ride the wave again, I am used to it by now, so it isn’t anything uncommon to me. The one symptom that really annoys me, is the sneezing fits.

Anyway, with that said, it is time for me to sign off because I have a nose to reattach after all this sneezing.

Until tomorrow,



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